Mundane Musings

Those fairy tales always started with a "Once upon a time..." and ended with "And they all lived happily ever after." Happily ever after? How was that even possible? After the rush of emotions and passionate wooing of a loved one, 'a happily ever after' should be yours by right, but all those divorces don't vouch for 'a lovey-dovey don't want to look at the flaws happiness' life.  This pandemic and the myriad things it brought to focus, led me think about what happens to passionate love after the seal of marriage is affixed on it. My knee-jerk response of course would be that the mundane takes over. yes, the mundane. How does mundane look, you ask? Well let me see -  - work, because more often than not, you want to be able to give the world to the other - food, its preparation, planning and imbibing - bills, because they follow you everywhere - commitments - family, friends, relatives, acquaintances - the dinners and the lunches, weddings, pa...

Few Moments and A Lifetime How does it feel to know someone for a few years But that feels like a lifetime Or feels like generations rolled into one; sometimes even births As if chasing one another through various births, only to catch up in this time and world. 13 years of knowing you and you surprise me still. I’m not one for particulars, can’t remember words, deeds or actions much Wouldn’t know the change in the contours of your face or the shape of your muscles From one day to another, quite unlike you. That doesn’t trouble me on any given day But sometimes I wish I could pick up images and memories Manually checking and remembering the time When you made me realize the purpose of my life. A life’s worth of experiences and lessons you have taught me A lifetime of knowing you may not adequate In showcasing your many wonderful facets Which to this day doesn’t fail to surprise me. It hasn’t all been roses and sunshine, you know ...

No other day in the life of a cupid-struck person comes loaded with pressure than the one that falls on 14 th February. Valentine’s day is and will be a major commercial jamboree for years to come. People who are in love, who might be in love, who suspect they have a chance in love are going to make this day matter. And as long as that happens, the celebrations and the pressure of that day is going to build up. In the rush to be a part of it, it is easy to forget the true essence of the day. Valentine’s Day celebrates love, rightfully so. It is of course infamous for being the day you ask a loved one to marry you or may want to know if the status of the relationship has progressed to the next level (whatever that might be). A married couple may need that day to appreciate the other’s presence and so on. Yes, these milestones needn’t necessarily have to fall on the 14 th of February every year, but a day set aside to nudge you to do something that can enhance your life is a welcome...

This particular ‘month that was post’ is quite unlike the previous few happy, filled to the brim with engagements that I have to write a post kinds. The irony is not lost on me. September was my birthday month. And many things were supposed to have happened – the very air should have tingled a bit, the flowers to bloom a bit more and you know and the earth should have tilted in its axis a bit. In dread of faltering  But I started the month with a melancholy state of mind that just wouldn’t pass. Try as I might, I couldn’t shake off the feeling of uselessness and over-ratedness of the very act of living a life. The questions juts kept coming, unchecked, unwarranted...what have I achieved so far, what is there to show of 39 years on this earth, have I utilized my intelligence and smartness to the fullest, where does this motley group of friends with their idiosyncrasies and uniqueness figure in the larger picture of my life, am I setting the right goals for Anakutti, am I too...

When fights and tiffs with your loved one, come your way And nothing seems to be going your way, Pause, turn and look at your loved one's face. The face you fell in love with in the first place The face with its unique contours and planes The eyes that have conveyed secret messages When times were, oh so great, Fall in love all over again Forget the pain and the pettiness of the moment Fall in love all over again.

Tomorrow’s Valentine’s Day. Yeah, I know…do you even remember? It’s surely tempting to scoff the day, especially if you are single and cynical or if you are hitched and practical or perhaps if are a little of both. But there’s no denying the fact that like all festivals or occasions that have got hyped in the recent past, this day too has gained significance in recent times.Open the newspaper and there are ads galore for dinner deals and the perfect gifts, check the internet and you’ll need to waddle through a great deal of pink and red hearts and e-roses to get to any shopping site. There’s so much temptation all around. It takes a really, really cynical person to not get touched by the ‘love is in the air’ feeling. Haven’t we all at one point or the other given significance to this day? The day takes on a great deal of importance when: a)  you have someone you’d like to show your love to. This is the coolest opportunity. b)  when you nurse an unrequ...

A Happy New Year to you! And please wish me back, even though it’s a month late. Yeah, I need it. There have been plenty of happy New Years in the 35 years of my life on earth, and even the others were not really ‘sad’ as much as they were ‘non-happy.’ If you know what I mean. Like sitting up in the night, waiting for the clock to strike twelve so that you can go to sleep and tell your friends the next day that yeah, I did make an effort; I stayed awake and ushered the New Year in. Like, after the euphoria following the New Year, having life and day-to-day problems take over. Nothing remarkable happening that year other than the predictable stuff.  I cannot think of any one year that hasn't started off the way I have expected it to. Not even when dad expired on December 18 th of 2008, leaving us bereft and helpless. Every single New Year  in the recent past, had started off like usual – the anticipation – what will the new year be like, the excitement – wha...

Happy New Year folks! Now that the anticipation, the waiting, the feeling that something special would happen at the stroke of twelve (and it doesn't) is over, I can start looking at other things related to the years - the one that was and the one that will be. The past year was good. Oh man so good...well, for obvious reasons. And if I can still say that it is good that we've married, then you can deduce that all is well in paradise right now :) Fingers crossed! The future, however, is scary. Just like it had been for 2011. It had been scary when it started, with too many challenges to face. So since my feelings about 2012 are similar, I am hoping this would be a good year too. Last year, S did the unthinkable. He 'rightfully' got permission for me to spend the New Year's eve at P's place (other years I have sneaked out on some pretext or other). I felt liberated all of a sudden. I didn't have to fib or hide anything. And I could enjoy the even...

I have been reading ‘Committed – a love story’ by Elizabeth Gilbert, of ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ fame. I love that lady’s books. She has a way of writing stories which I have always been meaning to write. She beat me to it…that woman! Ok just kidding. Aside from the small fact that if I wrote a book the only number of copies it would sell would probably be a grand number of probably 5; I don’t think I have the energy to plough through so many thoughts and insecurities of mine in order to come up with a logical story like what she has written. Still, it is a subject of marriage. And anyone tracking the lives of married people will note the number of contradictions that exist in this complex, living, thriving relationship. Which is what seems to be evident in her book too and it was with a bit of disappointment that I read the end of the book. It was hardly an ending, more a confused summing up of facts. But then I realized one could never come to a logical conclusion about this institution ca...

For forgetful people like me and S, God has thankfully given enough reference points to remember our wedding date when we sit in our verdant garden, a good 5 yea....er... 15years later, reminiscing the good ol' days asking - which year did we get married darlin? I am sure either of us could come up with the following: 1. Oh, the year Bin Laden was killed by the U.S. Forces Re: Yeah? And which year was that? 2. The year Jayalalitha came to power with a trouncing victory? Re: Don't tell me! Did we marry as early as the 1990s? 3. Ayyo! No baba, the year Mamata Banerjee became the CM of W. Bengal. The first lady CM. Re: Hmmm. Was that in...? 4. Yeah...the year India won the World Cup in Cricket. Re: Now you are confusing me. Surely not the 1980s? 6. Dear lord. Don't you remember even the Royal Wedding. Everybody was simpering over Katherine's dress and the dashing bald Prince. Surely you couldn't have forgotten that date? Re: Actually I think I have. I do ...

Boy meets girl. Fall in love. Get married and live happily everafter. My story? The boy in the picture an ex-business magnet in his late forties, separated from his wife, has two left feet but has a deep voice. The girl, a divorcee, in her early thirties, who is going through a phase of indian-born-clueless-female. So given such delicious context, it was a miracle that after 5 years 4 months and 15 days of song dedications, love notes, fights, shouting matches, near break ups; quiet, beautiful moments, fabulous lunches and dinners...we are now getting hitched. Whew! The easy part was convincing ourselves and our friends that we loved each other. The difficult part was convincing our families. So it was with great trepidation that I went to meet S's parents in their house wearing a trustworthy silk saree and blouse, looking as if I was completely sure of what I was doing. My mom who took some convincing to come around, was with me and our nerves were stretched ti...

I want to be happy. I can be happy. It's in my hands to be happy. My choices can make me happy. My choices can or cannot be accepted by people who can make me happy. I have to sometimes make them unhappy if I have to be happy. But when they are unhappy, I tend to be unhappy too. So happiness is as much my choice as I let others' choice to Influence me But I don't want to accept others choice. They make me unhappy. But I want to be happy. So to be happy, I need to be selfish. (Hah! Brilliant!)

Last year's Friendship Day fell conveniently on a Sunday... convenient because I had the opportunity to think about the role my friends have played in my life to date. I should be an authority on the subject - "You are what your friends are" and I am proud that I turned out alright. Being a very friendly extrovert I think I had the prerequisites for being the kind of person people hang out with. Right from kindergarten, (oh yes I do remember my head being repeatedly banged against a wall by one very healthy 'friend'. I was terrified of her!) to this date, I have had at least one friend to whom I could tell everything. I am glad I do. Parents do have a hand in infusing good qualities in us and I thank my parents too for giving me the guidance in choosing good friends. In preparatory school I hardly remember having a close friend (I think I could be excused for having greater things to think like; when mum would come and pick me up after a grueling day of learning m...

The plight of the single girls in our city is sometimes pathetic I think. There are so many out there that the competition in getting attention of any unattached male who neednt necessarily be worthy of all that attention is pathetic to say the least. I wonder if the same is the case for the opposite sex too. Anyways I have had the mis…er…fortune to over hear a conversation between two people in the gym. It is a given with these people around that one doesn’t come to the gym to merely exercise. Gyms have now become one of the coolest places to catch guys having similar interests and vice versa. So what if the only thing one found them doing was strutting from a treadmill to a cycle in designer wear and not really bother about serious exercising? At the cost of sounding like a frumpy 28 something, I must say Orkut has done its work of getting lots of clueless youngsters to mingle and wait for a tingle (er…thanks Karan). So here is a reproduction of the conversation between A (a loud...