Now that I have found my Mr. Right and have our pyar ki
nishani in my life, I don’t suppose I can hope to feel the rush of blood to my
brain (or is it the heart? Is that even logical?), or feel a shopaholic’s urge
to pick up gifts on Valentine’s Day. Because that was exactly what had happened
on 14th February. We were well aware of the special day, but were
content with a good lunch a day earlier, at a favourite restaurant without the
baby, and with chocolate doughnuts to sweeten the day. Over the years with S,
there had been no doubt about how I wanted to celebrate this day. And before he
entered my life, I was a romantic girl sitting in front of the TV watching
movies like When Harry Met Sally or Pretty Woman or Bridget Jone’s Diary with a
hand placed over my pulsating heart, thinking of the things I would do to
celebrate the day if I had a loved one. Yes, it was bad. The hype consumed me,
making it difficult to accept the banality of existence with no place for the
love to flow. My friends in the all-girls college that I went to were a good
place to start with. We gave gifts, chocolates and flowers to each other with
pink and red cards to boot. There wasn’t much to worry about in those days
clearly.
Anyway, I found myself in front of the TV after
Anahita had fallen asleep, without having gifted S anything and without even a
chocolate or a flower to mark the day with, but being completely okay and
comfortable with the way things were. Gifts,
dinner, chocolates…bah…they were symbolic of the day, yes, but we had created
and brought to life a token of our love and it was no mean feat. That gift
seemed to remind us of our journey every single day and we were bound by the
magic she spun around us. But isn’t that the very reason why there should be a
day such as this? To celebrate love…as the restaurant advertisement promises?
Imagine my disappointment on not finding anything
suitable on TV. Only Romedy Now lived up to its name and showed some romantic
movie, I don’t remember which, but all others were busy showing top action
movies at prime time. It was a Sunday after all one can argue, but hey, it was
Valentine’s Day. I wondered if this trend was going to last. Over a few years
for every sappy, valentine card, you will find one anti-valentine card. Now it
has become a tradition to read articles and blog posts that are anti –
Valentine. The singles are vehemently propagating them and some are downright
hilarious and genuine. They read more on the lines of - what is a Chennai girl
or a guy like you, who can’t pronounce ‘love’ without it sounding as if it was
somebody’s name ‘Lou’, doing with a red rose and a red t-shirt buying a coffee
you don’t know the spelling or pronunciation of, spending money you don’t
really have on gifts that whether or not drill a hole in their heart, would definitely make one in your pocket! I kind of agree to that but only as far the hype of celebrating
the day is concerned. I do however feel that it is important to remind oneself of the things that matter really in one's life, as is so succinctly in the below quote from Dead Poet's Society.
In our haste to pull down Romance from its airy, whimsical
place in giggly, frivolous women’s people’s hallowed mind, we have
rather painted the whole genre as being unrealistic…which maybe it is but if
taken in isolation.
One can’t expect to be mesmerized by the intensity of a
loved one’s gaze when the courting has been long forgotten; to expect to drool
over his/her delicious body part long after cellulite and age had played its
unforgiving part in it; to expect the spark to be alive through mundane and the
drudgery of everyday life; to find time to appreciate the presence of someone
in our life immediately after the 10,240th fight on the same issue.
The list could go on, but you can see where I am going with this.
Romance, Wiki helpfully pointed out, is something like this.
“Romance is the expressive and pleasurable feeling from an emotional attraction
towards another person often associated with sexual attraction. It is eros rather than agape, philia, or storge.” Ermmm whatever the second part of the definition
meant, but still the explanation is beautiful. Why are we then so critical of
being romantic? Is it wrong to be expressive of our feelings to another person
or to have an emotional anchor in a loved one? Why is it seen as a weakness?
When did our movies become all action and drama? If there is any romance at all
it seems to be done away with at an exotic locale with a foot tapping number
and just in case you catch them milking a scene, there you have it they have
made a comedy out of it. So now there’s an obligatory nod to romantic comedy,
because that’s the only way the majority seems to stomach the ‘R’ genre.
Anyway,
I can keep ranting about the whole movie and romance thing, but I shall not. I
shall hold my peace and hope for the faithfuls of the genre remain so and keep
their partners happy with the little somethings that an otherwise busy or
mundane life might not permit; and hope too that the critics soon learn that
love is what makes the world go round and for love to prosper you do need a
dash of romance in it. For want of a better motivating medium, why not look to
these lovely movies for some inspiration?
I
have steered clear of the movies that I have mentioned earlier and others of
that kind like All About Love, Notting Hill, The Truth About Cats and Dogs,
Sleepless in Seattle and oh the ever green You’ve Got Mail, and bring your
attention to some movies which are not on your face sappy romantic, but are so
well treated and different. These movies are especially of the past decade,
except for As Good As It Gets, and are the ones that I have seen and liked. In
no particular order,
1.
Silver Linings Playbook (2012) – An intense love drama about
people with issues falling in love. This beautiful movie with a stellar cast
will keep you hooked from the word go. “I love you. I knew it the minute I met
you. I’m sorry it took me so long to catch up.” Awww where are those tissues.
2.
As Good As It Gets – A classic. If you have not watched this
then truly this whole blog post will sound gibberish to you. “You make me wanna
be a better man.” Enough said.
3.
Flipped – A refreshing, young romance based on a book of the
same name. Girl loves boy at first sight. Boy totally disinterested. Then boy
starts finding her interesting, while she is slowly falling out of love. Will
they find love? There are many, many sweet quotes from the movie. But a couple
of my favorites are both Bryce Loski’s – “She’s laughing. How could she sit
there and laugh and look so beautiful?” and “I had flipped. Completely.”
4.
Enough Said (2013) – The movie that resonated most with me in
recent times. It’s a grown –ups’ love story and it scintillates with its
dialogues and cast. One of my favorite quotes from the movie – “I know this
sounds corny, but you broke my heart.”
5.
P S I Love You (2007) – The real deal. A tear jerker. One of
the bibles of romance and eternal love. Of the life after ‘happily ever after.’
The book was good and it was heartening to see the movie holding its own.
Ah…every scene is to be filed away for posterity.
6.
500 Days of Summer (2009) – This is not a love story – the
movie begins with this statement. And it goes on to prove just how much love is
not a girl thing but guys too feel a lot and that fate plays a big role in who
you end up with. The whole movie can have giant quotations marks. Every dialogue
or reflection is some revelation about love or relationship.
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