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After a while

Listening to Sholay – Yeh dosti hum nahi thodenge and writing this post. This week has been very difficult for me and it would be for a longer time…if not for those beautiful angels called FRIENDS. This post was not meant to be on friendship. But I am just not able to wade through the memories of the past week without paying tribute to the most age old of relationships.

The countdowns have ceased…temporarily
And I can’t try writing the reason for it Weei
Without feeling a pause in my heartbeat
Without feeling a sense of numbness coming over me.

The preparations will have to continue after a while,
Just as my dreams will have to be on hold…for a while.
But a while…is like an eternity
An endless void before I have the guts to dream again.

The rain is pouring and pouring with such intensity
On a day when I hoped to be making a transition
A transition which would have included
Watching this beautiful rain with him…from our home.

Just like this magnificent rain, after a very sunny humid day
The responses that have flowed from my loved ones,
Have cooled my parched soul and given me hope.
That soon…soon my day will arrive.

Each and every pal had the same words to tell me
Oh may the Gods bless their warm hearts and silver tongues
The words were like nectar to me
Drawing the sourness out and seeping me with their sweetness

As much as the week reminds me of the worst period of my life
It will always remind me of the power of love and affection,
Of friendship and kindness,
Of the goodness of investing in the matters of the heart.

I will have to let go of superstition, of doubts
Of negative thoughts and connotations
For the sake of all these wonderful people,
For whose sake we will have a celebration…

A celebration which will be as much theirs
As it will be mine.
But then…after a while.
After a while.

Comments

Anita said…
I guess growing up makes you realise that you need all kinds of relationships..

Chin up and look ahead.
Priyanthi said…
My poor darling! You have been through a lot, but your poem definitely shows your healing arc as well. Stay strong - it shall happen, and soon!

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